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Science

 

These are from test papers by students around the world.
 · "When you breath, you inspire. When you do not breath, you expire."
 · "H2O is hot water, and CO2 is cold water"
 ·  "When you smell an odorless gas, it is probably carbon monoxide"
 ·  "Nitrogen is not found in Ireland because it is not found in a free state"
 · "Three kinds of blood vessels are arteries, vanes and caterpillars."
 · "Blood flows down one leg and up the other."
 · "The moon is a planet just like the earth, only it is even deader."
 · "Dew is formed on leaves when the sun shines down on them and makes them perspire."
 · "A super-saturated solution is one that holds more than it can hold."
 ·  "Mushrooms always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas."
 ·  "The body consists of three parts- the brainium, the borax and the abominable cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abominable cavity contains the bowls, of which there are five - a, e, i, o, and u."
 · "The pistol of a flower is its only protections against insects."
 ·  "The skeleton is what is left after the insides have been taken out and the outsides have been taken off. The purpose of the skeleton is something to hitch meat to."
 ·  "A permanent set of teeth consists of eight canines, eight cuspeds, two molars, and eight cuspidors."
 · "The tides are a fight between the Earth and moon. All water tends towards the moon, because there is no water in the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight."
 · "A fossil is an extinct animal. The older it is, the more extinct it is."
 · "Equator: An imaginary lion running around the Earth through Africa."
 ·  "Germinate: To become a naturalized German."
 · "Liter: A nest of young puppies."
 · "Planet: A body of Earth surrounded by sky."
 · "Rhubarb: A kind of celery gone bloodshot."
 · "Vacuum: A large, empty space where the pope lives."
 · "For a nosebleed: Put the nose much lower then the body until the heart stops."
 · "To prevent contraception: wear a condominium."
 · "To keep milk from turning sour: Keep it in the cow."